Summer is here! Which means it's the perfect time to head to the beach and have some fun. While there's plenty of great DC Summer Specials you can check out as you relax by the ocean, this House of List-ery we're pondering a far more serious and impactful question than what to read by the beach. This week, I'm answering the age-old question: Which DC superheroes and villains would make the best beach volleyball team?
Now, seeing as a professional beach volleyball team only has two players, I've drafted two opposing DC Teams along with their coaches and have, of course, thought about this hypothetical way too long. So, grab a cold drink, blast "Playing with the Boys" by Kenny Loggins as loud as possible, and jump right in.
Team One: "Suns Out Buns Out"
Coach: Captain Cold
Look, it gets very hot on the beach, so having a coach who can keep you cool is key to winning the game. Not only that, but Leonard Snart has a history of coming up with intricately plotted plans to beat superheroes like the Flash, so he's coming into the game with a knack for strategy. If all of that wasn't enough, his brief membership as part of the Justice League means he has some great insight into the many potential opponents that his team may face. But as we noted, his biggest appeal is definitely the ability to keep the players cold as they duke it out on the beach.
Player One: Dick Grayson
Having a talented gymnast on your sports team is always going to be a plus for your overall performance, but let's not pretend we don't know why Dick is really a vital addition. The most famous buns in DC history were made to parade on the beach in speedos and distract potential opponents in the heat of the volleyball battle. It helps that he's also been trained by one of the most strategic and wealthy superheroes in the DC pantheon, Batman. So, you can expect dynamite looks and some impressive gymnastic feats from this soon to be volleyball superstar.
Player Two: Beast Boy
While Dick distracts the competition, who better to make the most of it than Beast Boy? Not only is Beast Boy a beach lover, but his impressive animal powers mean he'll be a near unbeatable player. Ball out of reach? Not for his octopus tentacles! Need a heavy hitter? How about a green gorilla? Looking for a bird's eye view of the game? Then Beast Boy can just shift into a hawk. See, he's an all-round addition to the team and also loves to chill and enjoy summer fun, making him both a key player and a built-in cheerleader. Just what any good team needs.
Team Two: "Reign of the Super Pets"
Coach: Sportsmaster
If you're planning on putting together any kind of sporting team in the DCU, you'd be remiss to not include at least one iteration of Sportsmaster. From his first outing, Lawrence "Crusher" Crock was the rare super-villain whose powers are centered around sports. With his sporty gadgets and impressive hand-to-hand combat, who better to train the next generation of summer volleyball superstars? With his infamous exploding balls, he's a villainous force to be reckoned with…but that's why we've teamed him with two of the purest DC heroes.
Player One: Aquaman
Not only is Arthur Curry a stone-cold hunk that anyone would be happy to see frollicking in the sand, but his unique connection to the ocean gives him a plethora of useful powers. From being able to commune with sea creatures to his super strength, there are all kinds of reasons that Aquaman would be the perfect pick for your summer volleyball team. Plus, place him alongside Supergirl and you can add pretty much all of the most famous Super Pets to your substitution bench, with Arthur bringing Topo the Octopus, Storm the Seahorse, Aquacow and Tusky!
Player Two: Supergirl
The perfect hero to keep her coach on the straight and narrow, Kara Zor-El is also easily the most powerful player on either team. She likes to play fair, though she isn't above using some of her Kryptonian talents to help her fellow players. Flight, superhuman strength, enhanced vision, and heat and ice breath can all be handy, but she also brings a famed super pet to the table in Streaky the Supercat. He's a good counterpoint to Beast Boy's animal antics, and when teamed up with Aquaman, the pair have a veritable second super team on their hands.
So, who would you pick for your ultimate DC beach volleyball team? Let us know your coach and two players over in the DC Community!
Rosie Knight is an award-winning journalist and author who loves Swamp Thing, the DC Cosmic and writing about those and more here at DC.com. You can listen to her waxing lyrical about comics, movies and more each week as she co-hosts Crooked Media's pop-culture podcast, X-Ray Vision.
NOTE: The views and opinions expressed in this feature are solely those of Rosie Knight and do not necessarily reflect those of DC Entertainment or Warner Bros., nor should they be read as confirmation or denial of future DC plans.